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[GregLondon@oaktech.com: Episode 4 - A New Version]
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Here's the message Hao was talking about.
-R
----- Forwarded message from GregLondon@oaktech.com -----
From: GregLondon@oaktech.com
Date: Thu, 24 Aug 2000 17:16:20 -0400
Cc: perl6-internals@perl.org
Subject: Episode 4 - A New Version
X-Mailer: Lotus Notes Release 5.0.2b December 16, 1999
Dan Sugalski <dan@sidhe.org> writes:
> I'm picturing a WAP-enabled cellular furbie with
> an R2D2-style projector thingie for the video.
> It's not a pretty sight...
"Help us Lawrence Wall, you're our only hope..." bzzp!
"Help us Lawrence Wall, you're our only hope..." bzzp!
"Help us Lawrence Wall, you're our only hope..." bzzp!
Dan Sugalski-walker removed the restraining bolt, and the
holo-projection from FurB-D2 dissappeared.
"Hey! Play back the message!" he screamed.
Fur-B warbled and wooped. Damian-3P0 whacked
him over the head.
"What do you mean, what message?" He turned to Dan.
"I'm sorry sir, he's been acting flakey ever since that
I love you virus. He claims to be the property of
a Master Lawrence Wall."
Dan sat down and pondered a moment.
"Lawrence Wall, I wonder if he means ol' Larry Wall."
"Who sir?"
"Oh, Larry's a crazy old hermit who lives in the dune sea.
He pretty much keeps to himself except maybe once a
year he goes to some big perl conference in the outer
rim of the galaxy."
"Really sir, I don't know what he's talking about."
"It's OK Damian, don't sweat it. How about an oil bath?"
"Oh, That would be grand sir"
( Later that night...)
Dan returns to the droid shack to get
Damian out of the soaker.
"Good evening sir. While I was bathing, I took the liberty
of reprogramming the binary evaporators. They now
can accept input in over ten thousand languages and
dialects, including latin and Klingon."
"Thanks Damian."
"And then I got bored, so I decided to recalibrate the
autopilot on the landspeeder..."
"thanks Damian."
"completely automate the environment control systems
for your housing facilities..."
"thanks Damian."
"Create a program so that all of your droids will automatically
download any neccessary patches from their manufacturers..."
"thanks damian."
"automate all the harvestors"
"thanks damian"
"and clean the garage."
"THANKS DAMIAN!"
"Did I do something to offend you sir?"
Dan sighed and said nothing.
Suddenly a look of fear covered his face.
He quickly scanned the garage.
"Hey, where's FurB-D2?"
Dan ran outside and pulled out his binoculars.
"Oh, he ran off sir. Something about completing his mission.
Would you like me to recode the DSP in that scanner
to double it's effective range, sir?"
"No! Come on, we've got to find him!"
( speeder scene, racing across the desert,
Damian-3P0 at the controls,
Dan scanning the terrain)
"There's something just beyond that ridge. Lets go!"
They fly over the land at twice the normal speed
due to Damian-3P0's recalibrations.
As they round the hill, a little fuzzball comes into sight.
Damian-3P0 pulls up beside him, and Dan jumps out.
"Hey! Where do you think you're going!"
whistle! worble! wail!
"Mission! You just behave, and maybe master Dan
here will reconsider deactivating you and using your
brain as a mail server!"
Dan looked around nervously.
"It's OK now that we found him. Let's just get out of here.
There's bound to be Python people around."
(war cry from off screen. There's a loud thud.
the screen goes black.)
Dan is lying on the ground. He lets out a moan as he pulls
himself to sitting up. He rubs his head.
"what happened," he asks rhetorically.
A soft, mellow, but sure voice answers from off screen.
"you had a nasty fall."
Dan looks around. He's in a server room somewhere,
or something very near like it. There are computers
everywhere and cables everywhere else. A man
is sitting on a chair looking at him.
"Larry?"
Larry nods.
"Larry Wall? What are you doing out here?"
"I could ask the same of you."
Dan points to the Fur-B.
"I was looking for him. He ran off looking for his owner.
someone by the name of Lawrence Wall. Maybe you
know him?"
"Lawrence Wall? Lawrence Wall. Now there's a name
I've not heard in a long, long time."
"Oh, so you know him."
"Of course I do, he's me."
"So.. the droid is yours then."
"I dont recall ever owning a Fur-B."
"He had some recorded message in him that was
addressed to you."
"I seem to have found it."
Dan turned around to see Fur-B sitting upright
with the projector thingy coming out of his head.
"Help us Lawrence Wall, you're our only hope."
but rather than going on infinite loop at that point,
the message continued on.
"Perl is pretty good, but we some improvements.
Unicode, better memory management, and
faster execution speeds would be really nice.
This Fur-B contains the plans for the next version
of Perl. You must get them to the perl 6 mailing
lists and use them to design Perl 6. Then, perhaps,
we'll finally be able to overthrow the evil empire.
Help us Lawrence Wall, you're our only hope."
The holo-image faded away.
"Dan, you must come with me to Monterey. There
I will announce the start of Perl 6."
"What! I can't go there! I've got work to do.
I've got to get these droids back. I'm in
enough trouble as it is."
"Well if you'd rather farm a desert,
by all means..."
"Wait, on second thought, I'll go with you."
"Excellent, now lets find a fast ship."
Larry and Dan get up and walk out of the room,
followed by the droids. As the door closes,
the screen fades to black.
(voice over)
"Tune in to our next episode when Larry and Dan
meet the motley crew of a smuggling ship, starring
Nathan Torkington as the swashbuckling pilot and
Tom C. as the first mate / wookie."
Greg London
----- End forwarded message -----
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